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| Penguin2006 | 2006.03.13 - 04:23AM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| Great story, kept me interested throughout. Fantastic description of Hyde Park. I've been there several times and it was clear as day to me, right down to those persistent squirrels. Mr Ollivander was entirely in character as well, great to see more of him. Wonderfully written, dusty and frightening. A small note: a British schoolboy is unlikely to say 'gym' but sports or PE (short for physical education). Gym is more American. I like the way Snape says Mama and Papa instead of mummy and daddy though. He must have got that from Septimia. The arguments between his parents were all too real to me, very painful. His father's low expectations also struck a chord. How hard it is to be a child or a parent! It's great the way that you've really thought this through - 'foolish wand waving' indeed. And so Snape turns to Potions and Occlumency. Some really funny lines that made me laugh out loud: “Length isn’t everything. It’s skill that counts.” "And I have a good nose."
Author's Response: *sigh* I'll miss Stephen and Septimia, and Hyde Park - but I'm trying to squeeze the park, at least, into my WIP of Doom, heh heh ;). It's difficult to have to picture a new arguing couple that doesn't just copy my original one. I'd like to keep my Ollivander scene, but then again, HBP has suggested that Snape is actually quite a bit more powerful than I was making him in this story, so it seems I shall have to start all over again... Thanks for the nice review! -S. | |||
| lunafish | 2005.09.10 - 12:28AM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| An intriguing snap-shot of our dear Potions Master in his youth. I know it's not canon-compatible anymore, but I like it all the same because it speaks to the frustrated, bitter individual that we find in the adult Snape. It could have gone this way just as easily as the way it did go in JK's version. You capture young Severus so well, as always! Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing, lunafish! I'm happy my version makes sense, because I love writing young Severus. -S. | |||
| Potioncat | 2005.07.06 - 10:34PM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| Poor Severus, just one of many disappointments! Very well written, and having read the stories that come later, this is a very good beginning! I particularly like the relationship between Severus and his father at this point, knowing what it will be...oh dear...I'm going to find it very difficult to remember Rowiling canon vrs Sigune canon! Author's Response: Me too :-). It is very hard saying goodbye to Stephen and Septimia, but well, new canon is challenging and exciting. The best part is that in essence, most of my backstory still makes sense... (whee!) Thanks for reviewing, Potioncat! -S. | |||
| Vocalion | 2005.07.03 - 05:41PM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| “Ha! Mediocrity beckons,” his father observed. “I did warn you, I seem to recall.”
Such a simple line, yet it foreshadows so much: Snape's need to prove himself, demand respect, seek recognitiion, chase the elusive Order of Merlin, his disdain for Harry's celebrity. Very nice description of Hyde Park (not that I'd know, having never been there) but I thought it set the scene very well. Great work, as always, Sigune! Author's Response: This is going to be an, er, Bildungsnovella... I like Hyde Park - I absolutely wanted to get it in somewhere, and decided that parks are absolutely indispensable to fatherly outpourings :-). -S. | |||
| SeaIsleWitch | 2005.07.03 - 12:36PM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| Nicely done, Sigune! I had heard through the grapevine that you had written a wand story. You were able to get inside little Severus' head and now we know why there will be no foolish wand waving in his class! I kept thinking he was going to paint it black once he got it home...LOL! I liked your characterization of Mr. Ollivander as well. I really enjoyed it! Author's Response: Goody! I can't believe painting it didn't cross his mind! :-) - But there will be more wand business in following chapters about which I mustn't say too much yet... I'm glad you liked this first part! -S. | |||
| Samson28 | 2005.07.03 - 05:37AM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| Very much enjoyed. Lovely insight into Severus' childhood. Author's Response: Thanks, Samson28! -S. | |||
| June W | 2005.07.03 - 04:20AM | 1: Prelude | Signed |
| Hmm, perhaps this is why Severus talks about "silly wand-waving" in class - he's reluctant to show his wand. But it's good enough for him to use to duel Lockhart! Looking forward to the next chapter. Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing, June! There will be more about wand-waving (and duelling) in coming chapters... -S. | |||
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