Home | Members | Help | Submission Rules | Log In | Recently Added | Categories | Titles | Completed Fics | Random Fic | Search | Top Fictions Reviews for Ashen and Sober Skies View All ReviewsReviews For 5. Four - TeaReviews For 12. Eleven - Sobering RealizationsReviews For 10. Nine - OptionsReviews For 18. Seventeen - Another MeetingReviews For 16. Fifteen - Answers Lead To More QuestionsReviews For 17. Sixteen - Resolutions and RevelationsReviews For 1. Prologue: Into the DepthsReviews For 2. One - Hell May Be EasierReviews For 3. Two - Returned to HogwartsReviews For 4. Three - MadnessReviews For 6. Five - InterludeReviews For 8. Seven - MemoriesReviews For 7. Six - Somnia AperioReviews For 9. Eight - Troubled WatersReviews For 11. Ten - DancingReviews For 13. Twelve - All We HaveReviews For 14. Thirteen - ProgressReviews For 15. Fourteen - Poppy's FrustrationsReviews For 19. Eighteen - Good IntentionsReviews For 20. Nineteen - A Perfect MomentReviews For 21. Twenty - The Astronomy TowerReviews For 22. Twenty-one - ImprovementsReviews For 23. Twenty-Two - EnduranceReviews For 24. Twenty-Three - Decisions June W 2005.06.12 - 11:44PM 9: Eight - Troubled Waters Signed Ack! Albus didn't go back to little-Severus by the tree with the leaves! Sigh... Albus could use some help? Author's Response: And help is on the way, I assure you! Lady Whitehart 2005.06.12 - 11:29PM 9: Eight - Troubled Waters Signed Such a haunting story. You have done a phenominal job describing Snape's personal Hell. Author's Response: Thank you, as always. I wanted something visually interesting, and I hope I've succeeded. Odd Doll 2005.06.12 - 11:19PM 9: Eight - Troubled Waters Signed This is a fascinating work. I like the dreamscape you created, and the way you don't shy away from the bad in your characters. If I had to make a concrit comment, it would be about your prose, and the language the characters use. I realize you are probably trying to go for a high tone, and that is great. It perfectly suits the depth and nature of the material. However, your sentence structure is a bit off. The twisting of the prose to get a bit of an archaic feel should not be at the sacrifice of clarity. The sentences should still flow, and yours don't always. This slightly-off sentence structure is a real problem in your dialogue. The HP characters don't talk this way in canon, real 20th century characters certainly don't. It comes off a bit artificial. It also makes your story run the risk of being overwrought -- too heavy, taking itself too seriously. I've had a sense of this a couple times, although overall it is very good. I am enjoying this story, and looking forward to future chapters. If you ever need a beta, you can contact me. Odd Doll Author's Response: I'm responding in full via a more interactive means, as I am interested in discussing some of your comments in better depth. Verity Brown 2005.06.12 - 11:19PM 9: Eight - Troubled Waters Signed Ouch, very troubled waters indeed. How does Dumbledore hope to fix this? Especially since Severus has, in fact, undoubtedly done so much of what he remembers. I see no way out of this. I sincerely hope you do. Author's Response: Where there's a will, there's a way. :) thewhisperingwolf 2005.06.12 - 11:04PM 9: Eight - Troubled Waters Signed Dreadful...painful....and fantastic. I admit to having a penchant for Angst Snape - but this is so, so dark...thanks for not taking the easy way to redemption - if we make it there at all. Author's Response: It is both extremely dark and very, very grim, and that is something that I really wanted to write. Ultimately, this is a redemption story, but the way there is a hard one. thewhisperingwolf 2005.06.12 - 10:54PM 8: Seven - Memories Signed Wonderful psychological landscape! Poor, poor child-Severus... Author's Response: Thank you! thewhisperingwolf 2005.06.12 - 10:47PM 7: Six - Somnia Aperio Signed I love this story. I've been away for a few days and have come back to three new chapters! Hurray!! I agree with the note about the use of humor - just the right touch to make it realistic - the the gravity of the subject matter bearable. Author's Response: Well, thank you, as always! As I've mentioned before (I love this author response box!), I'm trying to update every couple days or so. With as grim as the subject is, I don't think I could bear waiting any longer to read it, and I certainly have problems going more than a couple days without writing it. Fortunately, the story is nearly complete, so I have the opportunity to keep up with regular updates. Grainne 2005.06.12 - 01:46PM 8: Seven - Memories Signed Still enthralled with this story, so thanks. This chapter was especially rich, visually and emotionally. Author's Response: Thank you. I hope I can keep your attention, then. :) Odd Doll 2005.06.12 - 12:48AM 8: Seven - Memories Signed This is very moving and gripping. Author's Response: Thank you. Odd Doll 2005.06.12 - 12:48AM 8: Seven - Memories Signed This is very moving and gripping. Author's Response: Again, thank you. [Previous] 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 [Next]

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